As instructed, I'm preparing to go full speed ahead into a rant. Those that know me and read this will probably find it no different to my everyday conversations as I suppose you could say that I rant fairly often. Those rants are usually short-lived and entirely harmless but luckily for my readers, this one has a specific target audience: moronic people that say that they or their children are suffering from growing pains.
Personally, I had never heard of such a terrible illness until I was seeing a certain young man that I can now only refer to as an idiot. I remember that we were casually watching Brainiac (love that show) when he suddenly gripped his shins and fell to the floor, whincing. Obviously with great concern, HA, I asked what on earth was wrong with him.
"Oh I'll be okay in a minute. Don't worry, it's just growing pains."
PARDON?!
He then had to explain to me what that ridiculous statement was supposed to mean. Apparently, it's quite painful when your bones are growing because it stretches your muscle and skin involuntarily.. I couldn't do anything but laugh at him. I'm pretty sure I'd done some growing in my time, not as much as most people considering I'm around the height of a hobbit but still.. I had NEVER even heard of 'growing pains', let alone suffered from them. I thought that maybe it was possible that my Mother could've just had a different name for it or perhaps she was just too brutal to pay attention to my agonising e childhood experience of skin-stretching. I asked her at the time and she thought it was hilarious too but I had to consider the fact that she actually IS a bit of a hobbit.. did we just not grow enough to feel this horrific pain?!
Suddenly out of nowhere, everyone seemed to have either had these pains at a younger age or were advicing others that their children were probably experiencing it.. "poor thing!" I had no idea how I had never heard of this thing that everyone else seemed to have endured at some point of their lives.
It's now been about four years since this idea was introduced to me and it angers me more now than it ever did and that's because you're all LYING. There's absolutely no such thing as growing pains and if a Doctor tells you that that's what you're suffering from then it's because he has no idea what is wrong with you. It is simply a label that has been carelessly slapped on to what a sane person considers as aching legs because people just love to be ill. I can't tell you how often I see the exact same people in my Doctor's surgery. (I understand that means that I am there quite often too but I'm just a sickly child...) Just admit that your legs are sore. If your child starts crying about how their legs are aching then suggest that they stop running around and driving others like ME insane. I'll save the 'control your children' rant for another day..
So there you have it. For those of you that might be reading this and remember the pain you once felt, how you were told that it was just growing pains...
http://www.childrenfirst.nhs.uk/families/experts/g/growing_pains.html
WELL DONE, NHS.
About Me
- Danielle
- I spend too much of my time reading and not enough of my time writing. Unfortunately for me, I've been told that writers write.. so I thought I'd better give it a go.